Back in the Saddle Again,
Now Playing: Megalomania by Incubus
Topic: Family Business
The computer came home (finally) on monday evening, I pretended to my ex & a few other people that I didn't hook it right up monday when I got home but I did. I've been catching up since then. The ex had left an email on 4/7 saying he was coming the 12th. I hadn't heard from him since, there was only the 1 email on the 7th & nothing else either way. So thinking it was because he was in transit I went into panic mode, cleaned the house, changed my schedule at work, I had hounded my boss through sunday & monday to get me the 17th off. Then when I got the email from the ex that he was coming early I called work to change that & was told I had to come in & do it in person & thursday, the next day I work, wasn't enough notice to do so. I went in there & ended up face to face with the Director of the place who approved my day off with out a pause, originally he was going to set up for me to have both friday & monday, but I said no, friday should do it...
Open mouth, insert foot. Now this morning I get up & there's an email from the ex saying oh, change of plans I'm getting home the 14th, we'll be there the 16th!!
I'm going to let my boss sort it out with the Director tommorow when we're back to work.
Let me just state for the record that I wish my ex would either drop out of my kids lives altogether (no big loss considering how seldom he calls or writes or sees them:2002, 2004 & 2006-if he shows up) Or would move back to this state & file for visitation so we're on a regular schedule where I can say to the kids, ok, Dads going to be here to get you Tuesday, Thursday & next weekend...etc...(really I wish he'd just drop out completley, they barely know him after all...)
The thing that really upsets me is the knowledge that he may have been messing with me just to mess with me...No one else in the family had heard of any changes in his schedule but me. Which made me wonder about it at the time, but my work is so psychotic about days off & having to request them in advance & all, that I went & changed my day off. Now there's good things about having Friday off, it means I have to work tommorow but then I'll be off Friday & Saturday, but then it also means I have to work Sunday & Monday & the ex will be here for Monday which leaves things kind of open & rather dangerous for my kids who would be home with 16 in charge. Though Chris is supposed to be here too, I don't feel like I should put it on her to have to tell my ex 'no, you can't take the kids out on your own'. especially since I know she wouldn't want to call the cops if he gets pushy, something I have no problem doing myself at this point... We've been through enough & if he wants to be a dick, well let him. I can be a bitch too!
There are bright sides to the whole thing though, my drive to work at 530 last night with all 3 kids was a pretty drive with the sun in a different position from where it is on my way to work in the morning. Then after my business was taken care of we went to dinner at a mexican resturant which I really love. & then we went & got a push broom & some other odds & ends, wasp spray especially. At the big chain hardware store with the blue sign.
Then on the way home everone (but me) thought we needed desert, since my car needed oil though I stopped at a store & got everyone ice cream treats & a good time was had by all on a night that would otherwise have included homework, showers & negotiating online time for 4 people 2 of whom only want to play games & should be doing their homework.
It really was a nice night, the sort of impromtu thing we used to do a lot of before I bought the house & had more money because when I was in the trailer I paid $150. a month lot rent & once I got up over 10 bucks an hour there was plenty of money for most stuff... now my mortgage is 4 times what I paid for lot rent (I know thats still not much as mortgages go!) & the money makes it but there's not a lot of extra for meals out & picking up odds & ends when I need them. I'm shopping (thru the newspaper & peoples yards) for a used ride on lawn mower & waiting for a loan against my 401k to come through to buy said lawnmower. so because I'm also borrowing more than I need for the lawnmower so I have something available for other stuff I have a little extra cash right now. The better to look prosperous to my ex my dear! Though someone did point out to me that looking too prosperous could cause him to try to get me to take him back & that would be a pain in the rear because he can be charming & he is my younger kids father (16 has thought of this already & announced she's moving in with my mother if I ever allow that to happen- I'm sure my mother will be thrilled) I am still afraid of him, I still have a lot of trouble saying no or denying him things he asks for & it would be a real problem if he did try to get back in my good graces (always assuming he & the new wife won't last which to her credit I doubt they will, I take her to be too strong & sure of herself to put up with his bull for too much longer)